Like I said yesterday, it’s always worth taking the time to find the good things that you can focus on when you’re having a tough day.
On the flip side, my wise friend Kelly has told me many times that it’s also incredibly important to acknowledge and truly let yourself feel those things that are causing you pain. I’m hopeful that getting it off my chest and doing a bit of writing about it will help.
[break for anyone disinterested in my depressed rambling]
Thank you, Tumblr friends, for all the helpful suggestions, kind words, and messages that got me through a difficult day.
With the kids in bed and 30 minutes until “my stories” begin (Bravo, obviously), I feel like it’s a good time to focus on the things that did make me smile today. Even in the toughest times, you find reasons to smile, things for which to be grateful, and moments that warm your heart. It’s ok to acknowledge that it might take a little effort to look for them, but it’s always worth it.
*We hosted a BBQ for over 20 family members yesterday, and I managed to get the house back in order today.
*A woman at the gym stopped me to say, “I have to tell you, your son has really beautiful eyes … oh, wait, they’re yours!” Two compliments in one - I’ll take it!
*Will and Cooper laughing in the back seat. Whether it’s a fake burping contest, or making silly faces at each other (today), or singing along to songs, they are always laughing. It’s the greatest sound in the world.
*Will’s swim lessons are going, well, swimmingly! We just started up again after taking 6 months off (things did go so well last time), and he’s like a little fish.
*Cooper experienced his first automatic car wash, and I wish I’d recorded it. He was literally squealing in delight.
*The BBQ resulted in 4 half-finished bottles of wine, which is really all the reason I need to pour myself a huge glass or three. My biggest decision now is pinot, rose, riesling, or viognier.
Sad, tired, distracted, stressed, paralyzed with having so much to do and not knowing where to start. Just wanting to climb in bed and sleep it all away.
Today isn’t a good day.Open to any and all suggestions to get past this funk.
— Will, who apparently overheard my bitching to A last night (and probably several other times since this whole no-nap/quiet time situation is going to be the death of me).
There are approximately a million reasons why I love my mom, and qualities that make her more than amazing, but coming home from Denver yesterday really sealed the deal on her being The Absolute Best.
I’d planned a 40th birthday trip for A to Denver - just the two of us, a fabulous room at the Four Seasons with stunning views, eating and drinking our faces off, a Rockies game, and the real celebration the last night with The Avett Brothers at Red Rocks. Bucket List item - check!
When we arrived home last night, I was obviously thrilled to see our boys (I missed them more than I’d expected!), but what really sent me over the edge was seeing how my mom left my home:
*all of my laundry was done
…including the linens on the bed she’d slept in
*my children were fed, properly (fresh sauteed veg from the farmers market!)
…and had been bathed earlier in the day so I wouldn’t have to do it before bed
*dishwasher was loaded
…all hand-wash dishes were drying on the counter
*a list had been compiled of all food items they’d finished over the weekend so I could shop today
*the house was clean
*mail was in and sorted
*my toddler had acquired new words and new songs with hand motions
*my almost 4 yr old was well behaved! and napped! and didn’t talk back!
*and — this is SO my mom — I’d mentioned the night before we left that Lucy’s poop hadn’t been cleaned in the yard, to watch her step, and that we really needed to figure out a better system for keeping our tiny yard clean .. I came home to an entire Pinterest board that my mom created with ideas for dog runs and dog-friendly yards. Hilarious but awesome.
When my mom left, Cooper ran to the door to kiss her again and again. We waved from the door, then he wiggled frantically out of my arms and ran to the front window to watch her walk to her car, waving and blowing her kisses until long after she’d pulled away. I think that says everything about how much my boys loved having her here to care for them and love them. And that was a moment that made me love my mom even more, which I didn’t dream possible.
Thanks Mommy. You’re The Best.